You may have experienced them yourself-‑those odd “coincidences” that somehow seem to be more than just mere coincidence. They leave you with a strange feeling, as if, perhaps, you have suddenly stumbled into an episode of the Twilight Zone.

I have been observing and studying synchronicities for over three decades now. They have intrigued me and challenged me. Like many people, I have experienced a fair number myself. But as a psychotherapist, I have experienced far more, perhaps hundreds in my therapy office and in workshops.

Synchronicities are the result of a deep and profound connection between consciousness and our world of matter. But this connection defies our normal sense of logic.

In my twenties and thirties, I found the paradoxical nature of synchronicities to be disturbing. But 1 no longer think that logic is the end‑all‑be‑all god I thought it to be. Some things are neither black nor white. And our ideas of how the universe operates are just ideas.

I recently met a physicist in Switzerland who shared his views on science and human perception. I loved his analogy and I now pass it on to you. He said we are like children watching mom and dad playing a game of cards. At the moment they are playing canasta and through observation we have figured out some of the rules. Suddenly, however, they switch and start playing poker. The rules have changed, and we are in turmoil. Science is the act of observing the cosmic card game and trying to figure out the rules. There are, according to him, no cosmic laws. What looks like law can change in the twinkling of an eye whenever the one playing changes the game.

In some very real ways my encounters with synchronicities have changed “the game” for me. I had experienced them quite a bit in my twenties, but during my graduate training as a psychotherapist, they subsided. I was focused on being a professional person and I had no place for those strange coincidences. I did not, at this time, even know that there was a word for these odd occurrences. As I developed my private practice, I was very content, thank you, with my own little version of “the game.” I had my black and white niche down pretty well. I was a psychotherapist with a successful private practice. I had a waiting list of people to see me. I was secure, if not smug, in my position. Although I still occasionally experienced synchronistic events, they did not, in the least, threaten my logical view of the universe. And then she showed up. A referral from another therapist, Sue (not her real name) had been referred to me for long standing depression and paranoia.

The Fire‑Starter

In our first session, Sue told me that inexplicable fires often broke out in her vicinity. This un‑witting starting of fires was a great source of consternation for her, and she had the “up‑tight” presence of paranoid‑type personalities.

As a logically biased therapist I assumed she was simply deluded about the fire thing, but encouraged her to continue talking. It turned out that when she was about seven years old, she accidentally burned her family’s house down to the ground. From that point on she was afraid of fire, especially the ones that seemed to break out around her for no good reason.

Now I always had a candle burning in my therapy office, a symbol and a reminder for me of the “light of awareness,” a light that I was continually striving to attain on behalf of my clients as well as myself. This candle sat on the mantle of a fireplace. As we continued to talk, I heard an odd explosion from that vicinity of the office. I glanced over and saw to my horror that the candle had exploded and flaming hot wax was all over the mantle. In disbelief, I watched a river of burning wax streaming onto the wooden floor. I leapt to my feet and put out the fire.She said, “I told you so!”

I assured her that this was simply a freak coincidence, and that such things do not happen in reality (I have since come to believe that there is no single reality. I agree with Chomsky that there are only perceptual realities and that these are unique to each person. But back then, I was convinced that there was one consensual reality that one could use as a measure against all things). Armed with the smug righteousness of my perception, I assured her that I could, in fact, help her rid both the guilt around the childhood incident as well as her delusion that she was an unwitting fire‑starter.

We re‑scheduled for next week.

During our second session, as we discussed the details of her childhood fire, I heard the sound of sirens. Looking out my office window, 1 saw fire trucks pulling up to a house across the street. It had caught on fire!

I assured my distressed client that this was, admittedly, a really, really bizarre coincidence, but a coincidence nonetheless. It was not, and could not, logically be connected with her telling me the story of a childhood incident, even though the incident involved her burning down the family house. I showed her how to journal with the young guilt‑ridden child within and asked her to bring her journal entries when we met again. We rescheduled for the following week.

During the ensuing days, I tried to convince myself that my therapeutic plan with this client was the right course of action. I certainly had the bulk of psychotherapeutic theory on my side. The therapeutic task was clear‑have her re‑live the suppressed childhood event and talk about it, unwind it’s trapped energy in the psyche, try to bring to the conscious mind the turmoil that was being held in the subconscious. By doing so, the guilt would be purged. I would also continue to de‑sensitize her to fire by lighting another candle, demonstrating to her that I was confident in my assessment that such things as fire‑starters were mere delusions.

When our third appointment arrived, I was a little nervous. I lit the candle and sat in my chair. We started to talk about her feelings in regards to both her childhood and the recent two encounters. The discussion was very emotional on her part, and together, we were able to touch very deep feelings. I felt that we had reached a therapeutic moment, and I guided her into a light hypnotic state in order to re‑live the childhood incident.

The session was near its close. There had been no fires in my office or across the street. Victorious, I was about to announce this to her when, and I swear this is the god’s truth, a brand new van caught on fire right in front of my office. It had come to a stop near the intersection where my office sat and just burst into flames!

Stumbling for words of comfort for her, I mentioned the rather lame observation that the fire had moved a little further away from us, perhaps indicating that we were making progress.

We re‑scheduled. The following week a very nervous client arrived at the office of a very nervous therapist. But nothing happened. And nothing ever happened like this again. Her work in those four weeks transformed a childhood stigma, and the strange poltergeist‑type phenomena around her had come to an end.

Our work together had been successful, but I was uneasy. My logical brain ached from trying to stretch around the encounter. Was it possible for a human consciousness to actually create such a thing as spontaneous fires? I assured myself that such things were not real, just bizarre coincidences.

Despite my attempts at self‑comfort, the uneasy feeling did not go away. My professional training had never even hinted that such things could happen in the therapeutic process. I simply had no conceptual framework for such odd events.

Over the next year or so, I continued to get referrals of clients with strange psychological dilemmas. The therapeutic work often required that we enter transpersonal territory. For instance, sometimes the resolution to a current psychological problem was traced back to a “seeming” past‑life. I say seeming because there is no way to scientifically verify if an experience is from an authentic past life or a metaphor created by the subconscious mind. I have found, by the way, that determining the authenticity of a past life memory isn’t that important if it changes a psychological behavior in the present. As my grandmother used to say, the proof is in the pudding, but back to my therapy office. Odd coincidences were popping up all over the place like mushrooms in springtime.

Then I experienced a coincidence that truly blew my mind.

The Lizard Within

For some time I had been having a series of dreams in which I was being ambushed. A giant lizard with an Uzi automatic was waiting in the bushes to assassinate me as I left the house. This dream repeated itself almost every night for weeks. The dream was so disturbing and vivid, I had started to keep a dream journal and began dialoging with the reptilian assassin. I won’t go into the details here since it doesn’t relate directly to this article, but there was a lot of energy involved, as you can well imagine.

One night I was dialoging with the dream figure in my journal. It went on for quite a while, and I recall it being quite emotional for me at the time. I had named my would‑be assassin Liz, since it was, well, a lizard.

The phone rang. I remember looking up at the clock. It was nearly 3 AM in the morning. I walked into the kitchen and picked up the handset. The voice on the other end was clear though there was a lot of static on the line.

“Is Liz there?” it asked.

“Yes,” I replied, “and I wish he’d leave!”

I hung up the phone and my mind freaked. I mean what were the possibilities that some stranger would miss‑dial a phone number looking for someone named Liz, while I was dialoging with a dream figure named Liz?

One day I came upon the writings of the Swiss psychiatrist, Carl Jung. Suddenly I had a framework for these strange, bizarre, encounters. In his books, Jung painstakingly described what I had been experiencing. He even had a word for it ‑ Synchronicities were signs of something powerful moving deeply in the unconscious mind. When this movement was strong enough, it affected the external environment.

Dr. Jung traced his theory of synchronicity back to a very strange experience he had while with a patient. At the time, the patient was describing a profound and vivid dream about a bumblebee.

It was the middle of winter and snow was piled deep outside. All of a sudden, Dr. Jung and his patient heard a thumping at the ice‑crusted window. Upon inspecting the source of the sound, it turned out to be a bumblebee!

The possibility of such an event boggles the mind. The odds against such an occurrence are staggering. How could a bumblebee flying around in the dead of winter, continually bump up against the window of a room in which a patient was describing a dream that involved a bumblebee?

I was enthralled. Carl Jung became my constant companion. I read everything I could get my hands on. And a very strange thing happened. The more attention I paid to synchronicities, the more often they seemed to occur.

Synchronicities always have an odd feeling about them. I suspect this is due to a sudden alignment between our internal experience and the external world. For a moment our two worlds, inner and outer, seem exquisitely connected.

Sometimes synchronicities can be funny. In a workshop on the Big Island of Hawaii, a young man (let’s call him Joe) came face to face with the power of synchronistic events in a very amusing way.

Turtle

This was his first trip to Hawaii, and Joe had fallen in love with snorkeling. He would don his snorkeling gear, and slip into the water near the hotel every chance he got. Now it just so happened that the waters were full of sea turtles throughout the entire workshop. I know this for a fact since I also love snorkeling, and would visit them as much as I could. Some people like swimming with dolphins, but I prefer turtles. For one, I can keep up with them. Swimming next to a hundred year old sea turtle is an amazing experience. I remember swimming with one of these guys for about an hour. His face looked like Yoda out of Star Wars, and whenever he looked at me I felt like I was four years old, the world having been transformed, once again, into a wondrous magical place.

On the last day of the workshop, Joe went out for his last snorkeling experience of the trip. To his dismay, the turtles were all gone, not a trace of them. He remembered, however, our work on manifestation and began to practice it.

The Secret of Manifestation

In the workshop, we had been exploring the effects of emotion, especially as it related to manifestation. As part of this exploration, we had done an exercise in which we imagined feeling what we wished to bring into expression within our lives. The key was to be as specific as possible and to feel the emotions of having our desired outcome as strongly as possible.

The two together (specificity and emotion) are powerful allies in the manifestation process. M = S + E.

The key is to be as specific as possible, imagining the details within one’s mind as clearly as possible. Then … generate positive emotions in regard to the specific vision. Feel yourself having what you desire and very importantly, feel appreciation for already having it! The next step involves letting go of the vision and feelings. You have set up an electromagnet. It will begin to draw the situation(s) to you that will assist in the creation of the vision. But you have to let the mental magnet go, so to speak. Release the desire, and be willing to be surprised. Then go about actually doing what you feel is required to bring this desire into manifestation. It doesn’t usually work to just imagine it. You have to actually do something. But you will generally find that the “mental magnet” you have created will make the manifestation occur faster and with less effort.

There is a caution here, however. Be careful what you choose to create, and be sure it harms no one, including yourself.

But let’s return to Joe and the missing turtles.

Floating in the water, he closed his eyes and remembered what it felt like to be swimming with his old amigos. He told me that he felt this so strongly, he couldn’t tell if it was real or imagined at one point. He remembered calling the turtles from his heart and then continued just floating for a while. Then he opened his eyes so he could swim back to the hotel beach. To his shock and delight, the turtles had returned! They were swimming all around him. In bliss, Joe swam with his new friends as long as time allowed.

This synchronistic event was truly extraordinary for Joe, but there was a fascinating twist yet to come.

Returning to his room, Joe packed his bags to leave the hotel for his return journey to the mainland. As he was checking out, he turned to see a childhood friend who he had lost touch with. They had been the best of buds, and it was a great moment of reunion.

Interestingly enough, his friend’s nickname was‑turtle!

Synchronicities and Death

I have noticed, over the years, that synchronicities often occur around death or psychological passages that are death‑like to the persona.

I experienced a very strange synchronicity in this regard around my mother’s death. I had received a late night phone call from the hospice nurse saying that my mother was entering the dying process. I drove five hours and arrived at my parents’ house in the late afternoon.

When I got to the house, my father and brother were watching TV I went into the extra room where my mom was.

The attending nurse nodded and left the room for a moment.

My mom was barely conscious but recognized me. She asked me to get her something from the store, which I thought odd, but I went to get what she wanted.

Upon returning, my father and brother were still watching the TV Both of them were frightened by death and their denial had driven them into the living room to watch the tube rather than be with my mother in her last moments. I paused to see what they were watching. The television show had changed to a soap opera. In the usual cheesy daytime TV way, the main characters were in a hospital room with a relative who was, guess what, dying!

I went into the bedroom to find that my mom had just died. For a time I felt bad that I was out of the room when she passed on, but then I found out that such events were typical. A dying person often chooses to die when those significant to them are out of the room.

Schrodinger’s Cat and Quantum Uncertainty

When I was about four years old, my parents gave me a “Jack‑in‑the Box” for Christmas. And I loved it. I would sit for hours cranking the side while the hidden music box played Pop Goes the Weasel. On the final note, the lid would pop open and out would come Jack with his little clown hat on.

I titled this article in honor of that little box. I think synchronicities are a lot like that. Well, maybe more of a cross between Jack‑in‑the‑Box and Schrodinger’s cat.

Non‑aficionados of quantum physics might not recognize Schrodinger’s feline friend. The cat was never real, just a figment in the imagination of Schrodinger’s mind. At the time, he was struggling with one of the many oddities within quantum theory‑uncertainty. The problem with quantum mechanic is that you can never predict anything with certainty. There are only probabilities that something might happen or not happen. In fact, this so troubled Einstein that he quipped‑”God does not play with dice!”

In an attempt to explain the unexplainable, Schrodinger came up with an imaginary box. A lot of things in quantum physics are imagined since there is no way to look at anything that small.

Anyway, imagine that there is a cat in a sealed box. A poisonous pellet is released. Using the quantum model, you cannot predict whether the cat is dead or alive. Only when you open the box and look inside do all the probabilities collapse into one reality‑an alive or a dead cat.

Now I don’t know why Schrodinger chose a life and death example. Why not put in a piece of catnip and see if the cat was playing with it or not? No one I know of ever asked him this question, so I guess we will never know.

But now that I am on the topic, you can see that Schrodinger’s mind, like yours and mine, is a kind of Schrodinger’s box itself. I mean there were probably a hundred or so possibilities swirling around in his subconscious mind. A cat in a box; a dog in a box, or maybe a turtle in a box! Maybe the experiment could be whether the little tyke was sleeping or awake. So much nicer, I think, than seeing if it is dead or alive.

Anyway, thought is very much like this. You can’t predict what will come out of your mind until it pops out! Have you noticed that with your own mind? Thoughts can be very surprising, and part of this is due, no doubt, to the fact that thought itself is a quantum event.

Now quantum events are very small things, indeed. In fact something has to be smaller than a thousandth of an inch to fall under the laws of quantum mechanics.

Objects that small, such as atomic particles and so on, have such little mass (weight) they are not affected by the force of gravity like objects larger than a thousandth of an inch.

Now a cursory glance at neurophysiology shows that our neurotransmitters as well as neuropeptides are well within the quantum range. These molecular critters are responsible for thought and feeling as well as a host of other biological functions. And guess what-you can’t predict what they will do. You can only hazard a guess.

There are infinite possibilities for where a thought can go. But it is only when it pops into our conscious awareness that we can say with certainty what direction it is going in. Until then everything is up for grabs. No certainty.

Now let’s go back to the Jack‑in‑the‑Box theory of synchronicities. You crank and crank, and then suddenly Jack pops out of the box.

It is a very odd metaphor, I admit, to say that our psyche is like a music box, but there are some parallels. When something starts turning in our psyche, something that has a lot of emotional energy, interesting things can happen. I think this is like turning the handle on the box. And if we crank (build up energy) long enough, something pops out. Now this “something” can take many forms. Sometimes it is familiar, and sometimes it surprises us.

If we are angry, for instance, we might yell, or hit something, or we might just keep it inside. But this energy has to go somewhere. Energy cannot be destroyed. It simply changes form.

If our mental/emotional energy is strong enough, it can affect the external environment. This is what happens with synchronicities, I believe.

When I was in my twenties I was well set on the spiritual path, and I had become the politically correct vegetarian. I had gone to a restaurant with some friends, and I ordered the “spiritually enlightened” vegan salad and water with lemon.

But the problem was that I was protein starved. I remember changing the order in my mind as the waitress left for the kitchen. In fact, I heard a voice screaming in my head‑”Don’t listen to that vegetarian fool! I want a cheeseburger with fries.” But I said nothing out loud.

When the waitress returned with our orders she placed a burger and fries in front of me. My friends were aghast. They distinctly remembered me ordering the vegan salad.

The waitress shook her head in disbelief. “I could have sworn you asked for a cheeseburger,” she said.

“It’s okay,” I said. I ate the burger, and it was the best damn thing I had eaten in months.

This is an odd example of synchronicity, but it has all the elements required. There was a lot of mental/emotional energy being “cranked up” in my psyche. Somehow, the waitress had “tuned into” my real desire, which I had been hiding both from my friends and myself. When she returned with our orders, Jack popped out of the box, and she placed the object of my desire in front of me. Now this is quantum mechanics in action!

And I suspect that we are all creating synchronicities around us whether we are aware of them or not.

My reason for writing this article is because I believe that we will all be experiencing even more synchronicity in the future, both individually and collectively. And I think it might help us to recognize that synchronicities are a function of consciousness itself. They live in the nether world where mind meets matter, and they are an indicator of the powers we carry within us.

The challenge, I think, is how to interpret synchronicities properly.

Meaning and Delusion

All of this brings me to another observation about synchronicities. They don’t necessarily mean what we think they do. They are simply parallel events. Something has happened in the outer world that parallels something in our inner world. They are a signature, a sign that something deep has moved within the psyche.

I knew someone who miss‑read a synchronicity and wound up stranded in the middle of a desert. She was deeply into UFOs at the time and yearned to be picked up by the “mother ship.” For weeks, she had been having fantasies about going out to the desert where she would be picked up. I think that Close Encounters had just come out, and perhaps this fueled her fantasy. Anyway, one night while sending her fervent prayers “home to the Pleiades,” a falling star streaked across the sky. She “knew” that this was a communication from her galactic brothers and sisters. They were coming to pick her up.

Some might also call her experience a sign, but in my mind, signs appear on their own without any mental correspondence. In other words, she was fervently sending a prayer out to the universe when the meteor streaked across the sky. The meteor appeared simultaneously with her mental activity. This made it a synchronicity.

She quit her job and sold her stuff. She only kept some clothes and her Ford Pinto. She drove out from North Carolina to the desert of New Mexico and waited for the rendezvous.

But the mother ship never showed up. I think she waited for a few weeks, until she ran out of food, water and money. She returned home broke, with no job, and with friends who thought she had gone over the edge.

She had misinterpreted the synchronicity. It had not meant what she thought it did. And I think that is the danger with these strange creatures of our mind. Just because they have an “other worldly quality” and feel so strong, we best not jump to conclusions in regards to what they mean.

The whole thing is made even more complex, however, by the fact that sometimes synchronicities truly are a message from our deeper selves. In such moments they are like the finger of destiny, and a lot hangs on whether we listen or not‑just not always.

The Con

Several years ago, I had been hired as a co‑trainer by a well known personal growth facilitator. He was a gifted individual who transformed a lot of lives, but he was also a con artist. The closer I got to his operation, the clearer this became.

During one of the trainings, about ninety people had come from all over the world to study with him. He had sold this training on the basis that he would discuss sound patterning for the brain. He claimed to have discovered precise tones that stimulated specific areas of the brain. The audience was about half laypersons, while the other part was made up of professional therapists. It was a blast for me to teach such a motivated group of people, and I was enjoying myself immensely.

Then some strange things started happening, as they always did around this teacher. I had experienced this “lack of integrity” around both him and his staff before, but I had always been able to put these incidents out of my mind.

This time, however, they were blatant. One evening a guest neurophysiologist lectured to our group. She was an extraordinary woman with a depth of knowledge and wisdom that was inspiring. I happened to be in the audio‑visual room when she arrived and handed one of the tech persons a video. She was very clear that this video was not to be copied. It was a record of her latest work in subtle energy, and she was very protective of it.

As soon as she left the room, the tech guy threw a blank video into the recorder and started to make a high‑speed copy of the video he had just been handed. “JD (initials of facilitator) will love to get his hands on this!”

I reached over and stopped the recorder. “No,” I said. The action actually surprised me since normally I would not interfere in a situation like this.

After the lecture, I was preparing to go back to my room for the evening. JD stopped me and asked me if I would come by his house that night. “What for?” I asked innocently.

“I’d like you to help me figure out what parts of the brain these sounds go to!”

I declined. The whole night was spent in a kind of intellectual turmoil. I felt responsible for the ninety or so people who had come to study with us. No, I reminded myself. I was just a staff person. The responsibility was on JD’s shoulders, not mine. Besides I was being paid really well. Best keep my mouth shut and get through the training as best I could.

Looking back, my difficulties with JD had been building for several months. Every training I participated in revealed ever new areas of dishonesty, and I was nearing a crisis‑one of those choice points that determine the next course of one’s life.

The synchronicity occurred the next day. JD decided to do a group cold water Rebirthing, which in my humble opinion, was insane. But JD believed in taking people to the edge.

Rebirthing is a circular breathing process that can be quite transformative and illuminating if done properly. If done improperly, it can be damaging. Now, typically Rebirthing is done on land first. After one gets used to the breathing process and the intense phenomena that go with it, one goes on to warm water. In some instances, a person might even be taken into warm water first. But cold water Rebirthing is a very intense experience. I think there was only one person in the entire group of ninety who had ever rebirthed before. And on staff, I was the only certified Rebirther. Not even JD had had that much experience with it. And among staff, only two people had ever been rebirthed, and these only once or twice.

The hotel pool was filled to the brim with ninety or so people in bathing suits. One person would hold the head of the rebirthee, and he or she would then float like a buoy. It was an overcast day with cool temperatures that made the water even colder. I was concerned, but I told myself that JD was in charge. I went on with the program.

As I looked at the sea of bodies trying to deal with an improperly planned experience, I thought to myself that this was sheer lunacy.

My discomfort with the lack of safety floated to the surface again. But I reminded myself that t was just on staff, and not responsible. JD was.

I felt the presence of someone beside me. She was a woman in her late fifties with a very concerned look on her face. She told me that she was frightened by what was happening, but “if Tom Kenyon is involved, I know it will be okay.”

I was stunned at the timing. And I knew that I would have to part ways with my mentor. That was the last training I participated in.

I will never forget the synchronicity of that moment. In one lightening bolt it had stripped away my ambivalence and eventually led me into my own work rather than co‑facilitating another’s.

Final Thoughts

So what do we make of all this?

How should we deal with synchronicities when they arise, and how on earth can we figure out what they mean?

Well for starters, meaning is relative to the perceiver. Our brains are continually interpreting events and creating meaning even when there is none. It’s what brains do, at least the thinking part.

Having dealt with synchronicities for many years now, I believe that they don’t necessarily possess meaning. The meaning, if any, comes out of how we interpret them.

I have come to treat them more like exclamation marks. They are a sign that something big is happening in the unconscious. Thus, I have come to turn my attention inward when I encounter a synchronicity. I search for what’s “moving” in my own psyche. And I personally find this line of questioning far more resourceful than trying to figure out what the synchronicity itself means.

Synchronicities are a bit like platypuses that play in the waters down in Australia. These cute little marsupials span two distinct species. They have flat tails like beavers and they have fur. They are warm-blooded like mammals, but they lay eggs like reptiles. Strangely odd, they are the result of joining two diverse biological worlds‑reptilian and mammalian.

Synchronicities are also the result of joining two worlds –our world of thought and feeling merged with the world of external events.

As we enter the 21st century, the fields of quantum physics, biology and psychology are revealing a remarkable inner terrain. It is being discovered that our psychology reflects our biology and the quantum uncertainty of our sub‑atomic roots.

Our minds, our thoughts and feelings are all crafted from stardust. And I am not just being poetic here. The myriad subatomic particles that swirl with great uncertainty in the quantum soup of the universe were birthed from a fiery beginning that we can only imagine.

Mind and matter were forged together in the foundry of the cosmos in ways that we are only now beginning to understand. For those who wish to attain insight into the mysteries of mind and matter, synchronicities are like gold. What you make out of it, is what you make out of it. But it is gold nonetheless.

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It’s a paradox of the true spiritual path, but the more conscious we become of what limits us, the more limitless becomes our life. So, take as long as you need to understand the lesson that follows. It’s intended to shed much needed light on one of the more deceptive dark states that stands between us and the freedom for which we long.

The only purpose discouraged feelings serve is to keep your thoughts on what you can’t do. And with your attention fixed in this fashion – on what seems impossible – there’s no room for discovering what is possible – for what you can do.

Let’s cover this important discovery one more time.

The only thing that feelings of discouragement do is keep you busy doing nothing except feeling sorry for yourself, which is the perfect guarantee that your sorry situation will remain hopelessly the same. Enough is enough! You don’t have to put up with one more discouraging moment, let alone a life filled with its darkness. There is another choice you can learn to make besides falling into those familiar feelings of failure. Use this next higher idea to help you start thinking about those old discouragements in a new way.

Whenever we suffer over what we aren’t able to do, have, win, or work through, our attention in these moments is riveted on our own thoughts, thoughts that are busy telling us we’re somehow stuck. Maybe you can recognize some of these heavy-hearted inner voices. They say in one way or another . . .

- “I’ll never get out of this mess.”
-  “I’m too stupid to learn these things.”
- “I must have done something terrible to deserve this!”
- “There’s no point in going any farther.”
- “This is definitely hopeless.”

Now, on the surface of things, these all-too-familiar whispers of defeat – these dark voices that reach our inner ears, speaking to us with our own voice – seem to be genuinely concerned with our unfortunate condition. But a deeper look into this covert operation reveals these troubled thoughts are up to something totally different. There is an unseen “conspiracy of limitation” taking place within our own consciousness! Follow the next four ideas all the way to their stunning conclusion. They show us that self-illumination and self-liberation are one and the same power.

1. The more these gloomy voices talk to us, the more discouraged we feel.

2. The more discouraged we feel, the more certain we are that we have no other choice but to feel that way.

3. The more convinced we are that we have no choice, the less choice we have.

4. The act of identifying with this dark inner dialogue actually produces the dead end we fear!

We end up being able to go no farther with our wish for broader personal horizons because, unbeknownst to ourselves, we now believe that there’s no way to get past where we now perceive ourselves to be limited or tied down. The key idea in this part of our investigation lies within the word perceive, because – for the purposes of this exercise – the word perceive rhymes with deceive. And that’s precisely what this faulty perception is: a self-deception. Here’s proof.

There are no dead ends in real life. You must prove this bright fact to yourself, and here’s a good place to start: in any given moment, there is always something higher you can do with your life than sit there and suffer over what you think you can’t have, or do, or be. Why wallow when a small amount of interior work will act to change your reality?

Here’s one example of a new and higher inner action to take when faced with the presence of any discouraging inner state: See that the size of the discouragement you feel is directly proportional to the size of your insistence that life conform to your demands. Then, having verified this truth for yourself, dare to quietly drop that self-defeating demand.

The first time you bring such a light to bear on any discouraged thought or feeling, it will fade from view – much as shadows do when the sun reaches its mid-day zenith. Their departure leaves you with fresh new energies that not only grant you “new eyes” through which to see how you can proceed with your wish, but that also grant you the strength to begin the next leg of your quest.

For instance, maybe you’ve felt discouraged because you wanted to learn something new – a higher skill or a difficult lesson – but felt sure that certain limitations of yours placed this possibility beyond your abilities. And so you resigned yourself to feeling discouraged. While this kind of self-defeating behavior is commonly accepted as natural, it’s totally unnecessary. You can do something much higher!

Instead of falling into those familiar feelings of futility over yourself, work to deliberately drop those discourage-filled
thoughts that are telling you the limit of your present view is the limit of your possibilities. Who you have been matters only to those dark states that want you to remain that way so that they can continue to rule the day. Refuse to dwell in discouragement over who your own thoughts are telling you you’ll never be. Just get started working on who, and what, you are right now!

In other words, do what’s in your power and refuse to be discouraged about anything else. And keep repeating this new conscious action one step at a time, over and over again. It is in your power to learn whatever it takes – one lesson at a time – and make it all the way to your designated goal.

Here’s one last special thought to help summarize this important life lesson in liberating ourselves from the limitations of discouragement:

Any conversation you permit yourself to have with dark and discouraging thoughts guarantees you’ll wind up with a dozen good reasons for why you feel so dark and discouraged. When it comes to any negative thought, the first word you have with it is the same as giving it the last word with you.

Practice these higher lessons in self-liberation until you’re free of all feelings of futility. You’ll soon see how this new action gives you the last laugh on discouragement.

Be Fearless! Discover the wise and fearless presence of a bright new power that lives within you. Best-selling author Guy Finley’s newest book is a step-by-step guide to realizing your ultimate potential as a human being. It reveals fundamental secrets of our living Universe, and contains practical techniques to help you find the truly fearless life. 

Click here for more details.

Evolution Ezine may receive a commission if you buy through one of the links – these proceeds help keep the Evolution Ezine free.  Thanks for your continued support.

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Lately I’ve been really interested in looking at the meaning of words in new ways. Words are the primary way we communicate (especially in digital mediums). And they are symbols for what lies in our minds, both consciously and subconsciously.

By redefining words consciously, you can actually begin to rewire your subconscious for your benefit. That’s because as we live more consciously, our subconscious is also affected (whether we’re trying or not).

Today, I’m going to look at “optimism.” In most contexts, we think of optimism as assuming a positive outcome. The first definition in a dictionary supports this view:

“A tendency to expect the best possible outcome or dwell on the most hopeful aspects of a situation”

In other words, it’s an expectation that the future will be ideal.

What’s missing from this equation though is context. Who exactly decides what is “more ideal” or “best possible outcome” or “hopeful aspects”?

Is it your ego? How does that compare if somebody else’s ego disagrees?

For example a tennis match. Both players are optimistic that they will win. Each player has practiced for many years and has a variety of excellent techniques to defeat their opponents.

Yet only one can win. Therefore, we have to ask:

Does optimism serve them both?

Sure they both can expect to win. Sure both can prepare to win. Since only one can win though, this view of optimism is limited.

I’m beginning to wonder about a different way of looking at optimism. Here’s two other definitions of optimism:

“(a) The doctrine that this world is the best of all possible worlds.

-and-

“(b) The belief that the universe is improving and that good will ultimately triumph over evil.”

Regardless of whether we look at it from the perspective of good versus evil, I particularly resonate with these two definitions.

What if instead of viewing the world as inherently good or evil, we viewed it in terms of optimization?

What if instead of asking “Why do bad things happen to good people?” we asked, “How might this experience ~optimize~ for the greatest benefit of the world?”

This perspective makes a lot more sense when we consider the definitions of “optimize:”

“(a) To make as effective, perfect, or useful as possible.”

“(b) to make the best of.”

In this view, it’s no longer about being hopeful or optimistic in the traditional sense. It’s not about thinking positively about our own unique situation.

We’re challenged to ask bigger questions. Questions that go beyond just what our egos want to say about how an “ideal” situation looks.

We can think about optimization in a larger sense. We can consider how our own personal experience might be contributing to a larger whole.

It’s often said “the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.” Thus, if we are all parts of a whole, it stands to reason that our personal “optimizations” are contributing to the whole…

And often in ways we can’t know or comprehend.

When we step the ego aside for a little while, we have an opportunity to experience optimism in this new way. Experiences, however personal they are, however difficult they are, might just be a doorway through which the Universe is optimizing itself.

The interesting thing about optimization is that we can’t know what it looks like. Some might say that an optimized car might go faster in a shorter time period. That is true. However, an optimized car also might use less resources, be lighter, recycle easier, be easier to drive, or just an awesome stereo.

All of those are ways in which optimization for a vehicle could happen. Yet if we only focus on making faster cars, we lose out on the possibility that there’s many ways to optimize a car.

Or maybe, while trying to optimize a car a totally different technology is discovered… perhaps giving rise to a new supercomputer or flying saucer technology.

Take for example this story…

Alexander Fleming was a scientific researcher in the early 1900′s who had been on vacation. After returning, then working, he set aside a stack of bacterial cultures.

When he returned to the laboratory, he discovered that one of those cultures had been contaminated with a fungus. He also noticed that all the bacteria around that fungus had been destroyed.

This was how one of the greatest disease-preventing agents in history was accidentally discovered. It was named “penicillin.”

Sure there’s lots of accidental discoveries in the world. It happens all the time. Perhaps that’s because the Universe seems to have an optimizing nature about it.

We don’t always understand what is being optimized. We don’t always know why. But it seems that there’s something about experiences that gives us the opportunity to optimize personally and as a collective.

Similarly, there’s also different ways to optimize your life. You can’t know exactly what “more confidence” will look like in your life. And yet, as you develop your confidence more fully, your life optimizes as a byproduct.

Maybe you engage more socially. Maybe you ask for a raise. Maybe you start a new business. Maybe you challenge your partner to live more fully and lovingly. Or maybe it will lead you to take a risk that leads to a new discovery about yourself.

Who knows?

All we know is that when we view the world through the lens of “optimization,” it creates a land of mysterious and unknown possibilities.

Think about it. Give it a try. See what you discover.

Your Partner In Transformation,
Chris Cade

—————————-
About “Optimize Your Life”

Finding the time to chisel away at your subconscious mind can be some peoples’ greatest challenge. In Chris’ new 35-page BONUS book, he shares with you 24 1/2 (yes, that’s one HALF) of his best strategies for adding hours of extra time to your week.

Click here to learn more about Optimize Your Life: Optimize Your Life

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Real Tips & Tools that Work!

Not tuning in to your energy and emotions could cost you a lot more than you bargained for this holiday season. Following the guidance that your emotions can provide you is the single most important practice for the Deliberate Creator.

Positive Mental Attitude (PMA) is Over-rated

Why is positive mental attitude over-rated? Feel the fear and do it anyway? I don’t think so.

Fake it ’til you make it? Not a good plan.

Why am I asserting all these things we’ve all heard over and over again – don’t work?

There’s one simple reason. There’s an all important element missing in the equation. What’s the missing element? It’s your emotions. More specifically, it’s the disregard of your emotions as information.

Emotions As Guidance

We all know that everything is energy. Your emotions are energy, too. How you feel is a sort of bio-feedback mechanism. Your energy, via your emotions, is a reference point telling you how you are focusing your attention. Blindly forcing a positive mental attitude (PMA) on top of negative emotion is a disregard for the information your emotional guidance system is trying to show you.

Feeling fear, anxiety, anger (or any negative emotion) and then going into action anyway is a poor use of your energy. The results you get won’t be as satisfying, if you get results at all. Faking it until you make it might fool some people and last in the short term. But you can’t fool Mother Nature. You can’t fool the Universe with inauthentic (misaligned) action or energy.

What Is Aligned Action?

We all know what mis-aligned energy and actions feel like. Have you ever been there? I have. It’s especially easy to get out of whack during the holidays. Doing things you think you ‘should’ do with a disregard for self-care. Too much running around. Too many parties. Eating and spending too much. These are all actions that pull us farther away from well-being.

Aligned energy and actions are things that feel good when you do them. It feels like you’re going with the flow, rather than bucking the current. It’s like driving and getting green lights all day long.

How Do I Align My Energy?

As you plan all your goings and doings for the day, keep in mind how you want to feel through it all. What do you intend to accomplish and how do you want to feel? By simply calling to mind your intentions before you take action, you send a powerful energy current in advance of your actions. Try it. You’re going to like it because it really works.

What If I Don’t Want to Do Something I Should?

We all have too many ‘shoulds’ placed on us by ourselves or others. So I reflect back to you: “Is it a SHOULD or a MUST?” In other words, if it’s a MUST (like paying the rent) then it’s an agreed upon arrangement that you entered into and it’s your responsibility to honor your commitment. To remain in integrity, that would be a MUST.

A SHOULD, on the other hand, is an entirely different situation. Ask yourself a different set questions:

“Will it add to my well-being or diminish it?”

“Am I doing it in order to look good or gain approval?”

“Who’s point of view is running my decision to do this thing?”

Can you imagine what our lives would be like if we put our well-being in the first position? Perhaps you think that would be selfish. My own mother would. She sacrificed it all, her emotional balance, her health, her happiness. She was raised believing you have to sublimate your self for the family. From my point of view, that didn’t work out so well.

Well-Being, Vitality, Joy, Fulfillment, Freedom, Generosity, Flexibility, Creativity. Those states of being all equate with being connected with our Source (I call that God). That’s our true identity. When we vibrate our true nature – everybody wins.

Make It A Win-Win

This holiday season make it a Win-Win. Delegate to others when making your (never-ending) To Do List. Allow them to get in on the contribution. Let them know you appreciate it and that they’re an important piece to the holiday mix.

Take time for you. Put your feet up. Take daily 15 minute time-outs with nothing at all to do. Make one less meal. Go to one less party. Like and approve of yourself.

What if you could manage your energy this well all year long? It might become a new habit. We all have endless opportunities to get it right. Any time you notice your energy going south, simply notice the pattern and consciously choose to shift your focus. This approach is so much different than feeling the fear, or slapping a positive affirmation on top of anxiety. Conscious choice is evolution of consciousness.

All our energy; emotions, thoughts and feelings are either by choice of by default. Evolve your state of being by choosing your energy preference. May you enjoy success deliberately choosing your energy. And may you have a holiday filled with well-being, loving connection and joy.

——————————

Nanette Geiger is a best selling author, sought after speaker, and Law of Attraction Expert. She specializes in helping others break through barriers in their Relationship with Love and Money. Nanette’s best selling book “Create the Love of Your Dreams, is the Essential How-To Relationship Book Using the Law of Attraction.”

Nanette teaches transformational technologies based on cutting edge brain science, quantum science and universal principles. Prior to manifesting the love of her dreams and attracting her dream career, Nanette was a real estate investor and prior to that she was an opera singer having sung on 6 of the 7 continents.

Nanette is a friend – and an active member of our Evolution Ezine Community – and she asked if she could gift us all with 30 Mini Law of Attraction Videos

These Law of Attraction Videos will help you to apply the Law of Attraction on a practical, day to day basis.

Every other day you’ll receive a new video that’s short and sweet.

They’ll remind you of your value. They’ll help you reconnect with your power, and remind you how loved and valuable you are.

They are a great way to start the day, feeling great so you can create your BEST day! To get started just visit……

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A while ago we asked Evolution Ezine readers for their favorite words of wisdom. We selected 18 of their favorites and featured them in this video…

www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hWR8G-daKY

———————————————————————————————————--

Right click here to download your 18 FREE Inspirational wallpapers from the Words of Wisdom video (the file is zipped)

Instructions -- Download, unzip, select favourite, then right click on image and select “set as desktop background”

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If you like the video, the music or the free gifts, please click here to visit Youtube and rate and/or comment

…and if you like the message -- Please share the wisdom…

Thank you.

The music in the video was taken from the ‘intense’ version of Deep Delta: Elixir Acoustica

Though not really ‘intense’, the brainwave entrainment is definately more noticable than the subtler standard version.

We created 2 versions and you can listen to BOTH albums in FULL for FREE -- Click Here

Here’s the scoop…

Typically we experience Delta Brain Wave patterns only during deep sleep – and it is during “deep sleep”  that our body gets to “truly” relax – which essentially “turns on” the bodies ability to rejuvenate and heal.

While in Deep Delta the bodies limbic system moves into a state of balance (day to day stress plays a number on it) – and the pituitary gland is free to release growth hormone (which isn’t just for babies – growth hormone is essential in cell rejuvenation).  In general during deep delta our body is bathed in the chemicals it needs to reset and rebalance – and when we don’t  get our daily dose of delta – well – we pay the price…

Sleep scientists are discovering that those experiencing chronic pain are not entering these deepest levels of sleep – their bodies/minds are just not allowing that much relaxation.  And the lack of this time in Delta is (may be) causing the limbic system to move even more out of whack – which is causing an even greater inflammation in the system – which is increasing the pain level – which is making  it more difficult to enter deep sleep – which is….

Well – you get the picture

To Break the Cycle….

We have created an audio – which we have named Deep Delta – Elixir Acoustica -  which has been designed to teach your brain how to easily entrain into Deep Delta.  Over time (how many listenings will depend upon the individual) it is expected that a portion of your brain will begin to ease into Deep Delta – which will then turn on all the relaxation and restorative functions of the Delta state.

Listen to the both versions of Deep Delta: Elixir Acoustica for free here

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I’m eating lunch with my friend Marlena, sitting next to a window streaked by the chill November rain, our umbrellas dripping against the wall.

“Remember our conversation last time?” she says, “The week after my sixtieth birthday party?”

“Of course I remember,” I say – we had talked about attitudes toward getting older and self-fulfilling prophesies (see “But I Don’t FEEL Sixty …”).

“Well, it really helped, what you said.  I was starting to get bummed out, you know?  And you got me onto the right track.  Only a number, right?”  She laughs.

I smile and nod.  “Always happy to shed a little light into this dark world,” I say, hoping she’ll catch my irony and not think I’m being, like, arrogant or anything – Marlena picks right up on those things.  But no, she’s still smiling.

“I still think about that conversation,” she continues.  “And the other day it hit me.”

“Yes?” I say, my question mark hanging over the table between us.

“It just hit me – what comes next.”  She smiles, end of thought, as if somehow I should know what she intends.

“Um, what, Marlena,” I say.

“Sixty more!” she says, spreading her hands.  “Sixty more.”

“Uh, Marlena”, I say after a long pause.  “Sixty more would make you a hundred and twenty.”

She nods rapidly, smiling.

“I read in the paper, a few years ago, where a woman died at a hundred-and-twenty-two, the oldest person in the world, I think.  She was blind, deaf, toothless, couldn’t walk, could barely sit up.  Not pretty.  I don’t think I’d like that,” I say.

“Yeah, most people say something like that,” she says, sounding a little disappointed.  So much for me being a visionary.  “But I don’t think it has to be that way, if you keep yourself in shape and maintain the right attitude, and with a little help from modern medicine.”  She looks up and grins.

“But that’s not even what I’m trying to get at,” she continues, “— the possibilities do exist now, of remaining healthy and vigorous at really advanced ages.  The whole point though, for me, is how do you look at your life?”

I nod, in listening mode now.

“So the question I ask myself is, ‘How would my life be different if I expected to live another sixty years?’  How would I feel that was different?  How would my outlook change?  What would I do differently?

“Right now, most people my age are expecting to live maybe another twenty, or thirty years at most.  They want to retire; they want to stop working or not work so hard.  And travel more.  They’ve got bucket lists – places to see, things to do before they get too decrepit, before they die.  They are winding down, disengaging from life, disinclined to take on anything new.  Patch up the old as best you can, ‘cause you’re not going to need it much longer.  Right?”

“That’s right,” I agree.  What she’s saying is pretty much how it is.  “So what’s wrong with that?” I say.  “I’m tired of working forty or fifty hours a week.  I want to read more, to garden, play more tennis.  And yes, I do want to travel – never really did get to do much of that.”

“Nothing at all wrong with that, but your financial planning is going to need to be much longer term, if you’re not planning to be feeble or die at 85.  So you’re probably going to need some kind of income.  The thing is, being able to work as much or as little as you want to or need to.”  She pauses.  “So what if – what if you really think you might have another sixty?  What would that be like – for you?”

“Hmmm,” I say, thinking.  “It would sort of be like being a twenty-five-year-old, expecting to live to eighty-five, wouldn’t it.  But not exactly the same.  I don’t think I’d be going to clubs, thinking about starting a family, or starting a career.”

“You might be thinking about starting another career,” she says wryly.

“Yeah, you’re right,” I say.  “Actually, I just did that three years ago, and who knows, I might do it again someday.”

“And you have a family, but what about someone else who doesn’t?  They could start one in their sixties – why not? They could adopt or be foster parents, perhaps, if they couldn’t or didn’t want to make babies.  And with sixty more years, expect to see them grow up and then some.”

I’m starting to get into this idea.  “One really great thing about it would be that you’d have more time,” I say.  “Those things that you wanted to do when you were younger, but didn’t get to – you still could.  Maybe not play in the NBA, but you could go to med school at seventy and still expect to practice for thirty or forty years.  I could be a paleontologist someday, like I had wanted to be when I was twelve.  Learn to play the violin.  Live in South America for a while”

“You could write that novel, maybe a bunch of them.  Run for office,” she says, smiling.  “There would be plenty of time.  Space out that bucket list – there’s no hurry.”

“But hold on,” I say, my enthusiasm suddenly flagging a little.  “What if I don’t live sixty more years?  You know, they always say, ‘Live every day as if it were your last.’

“If you don’t, well – you don’t.  None of us really knows when we’re going to go, right?  I think that saying means, ‘Don’t put off the really important things.’  That applies no matter what age you are.  Have your affairs in order.  That old friend you’ve lost contact with – look her up.  Never know how long she’s going to last.  The important thing is not the fact of sixty more years, it’s the attitude – it’s a whole nother way to look at your life. Don’t assume limits if you don’t have to.”

“I’m starting to see what you mean,” I say.  “How would it be different?”

How would your attitude toward life be different if you expected to live another sixty healthy years past your sixtieth birthday?  How would that feel?  What would you do differently?  Think about it!

—————————————-

Donald is a hypnotherapist and NLP practitioner in Silver Spring, MD, where he helps his clients resolve troublesome issues in their lives. He has been happily married since 1977 and has three wonderful grown sons. His website is http://www.hypnosissilverspring.com/ and his blog is http://www.hypnosissilverspring.com/blog/.

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Boring – Mudane – Dull – Drab

That is the way 80% of Australians describe their lives … and another 10% won’t admit it. Less than an estimated 10% of our citizens consider their lifestyle acceptable and pleasant. – That is – only one in ten people are satisfied with their lot in life. Some consider it exciting – others merely consider it as non-boring!

And what is it that causes this 10% of the population personal satisfaction?

Simple …..they are prepared to live outside their own personal comfort zone. If you do NOTHING to stretch your talents, thinking patterns, knowledge, experience, and inter-action with others, you are living INSIDE your own comfort zone. You are living on your own personal Island….welcome to boredom!!

But, if you are prepared to push yourself slightly, life takes on a new meaning. Take the true example of a lady whose husband died and left her all alone in the world. Her kids were grown up and were involved in their own life. She had made few outside friends as she had been totally involved in her husbands work. For three years she virtually did nothing socially but suddenly she “flicked” into a different mind-state. She joined a dance club and an up-market singles organization. Now, 12 months later, she is an excellent dancer and is also secretary of the singles club. But most importantly, she is enjoying the life that used to pass her by. She pushed herself outside the security of her personal comfort zone – she took the first step to a better life!

The simplest way to “break out” is to join a club – any club – but obviously one that appeals to you. Clubs are basically groups of like-minded people who do things that they would not do if left to their own devices. Make sense?? Virtually all clubs have a couple of dynamic members who DO things. Quite often these are the same people who initially formed the club. These people “push” others along with their enthusiasm. The net result is that you do things you wouldn’t normally do. If you don’t want to join a group like this but you want to extend yourself personally, then the simplest way is to set a few personal goals which push you outside your aura of comfort.

For example, if you feel uncomfortable driving your car in heavy traffic and big cities, take a few days off and do just that! Push yourself. If you are a shy, nervous type and want to gain massive dollops of self confidence very quickly – take a hot-air balloon ride, or approach a rappelling club for a trial rope descent down a 2Oft cliff face, or take a ride on the back of a commercial Harley Davidson motor bike, or take a helicopter flight, or, if you’re really daring do a tandem parachute jump. Some of these ideas might sound a bit radical (or maybe a bit tame!) but if you’ve never been involved in anything like this before it will give you such a giant “buzz” you will remember it for years.. AND …. you will feel really good about yourself.

Let me give you a personal example of what I mean: Many years ago I did a trading/exchange deal which left me with a number of small lower priced items, one of which was a fairly old jet ski. Now I was NOT a good swimmer and felt very nervous if I got out of my depth in water, so the idea of falling off the ski in 2Oft of water was somewhat daunting. However I donned the life-jacket and started the engine. I was decidedly nervous, not about the ski, but about the water.

After a couple of weeks it suddenly dawned on me that I was not only staying upright on the machine (it was one of those stand-up models) without any fear but I had occasionally forgotten to put my life jacket on! In view of the fact I was being “dumped” in the water regularly I was rather amazed that my fear had been so easily overcome! And the funny thing was I didn’t notice it happening – it sort of crept up subconsciously! Shortly after that I took up scuba diving – something I’d always been keen on but my nervousness of the water deterred me.

Seeing I’ve mentioned all this, I may as well tell you about another experience I had many, many years ago. I’d always had this urge to do a parachute jump, and because my parents were dead against, I went ahead and did it! And, it was so totally amazing that skydiving became my weekend relaxation for nearly 10 years. Which is even more surprising – because I was terrified of heights. Let me just say that with skydiving there is virtually NO sensation of height or falling – the overall sensation is one of floating! (And you can’t drown!)

These are classic examples of facing your fears …. step by step.

What I’m saying is that if you want to improve your satisfaction in life, tackle those things you wouldn’t normally do! You don’t have to go “overboard” – just tackle things slowly and deliberately. Each achievement, no matter how minor, will give you an inner glow of satisfaction. If you don’t continually step outside your security zone, things will become mundane! And the interesting thing is that as you join into an increasing number of outside activities, you will meet more and more like minded people – who will carry you along with their enthusiasm.

Be aware thought, that when you intentionally embark on “pushing” your comfort zone, you will receive quite a lot of implied criticism from well meaning – but boring – friends. You may have to leave them behind as you develop a new range of contacts! It is a fact that your immediate circle of friends are probably all inside your current comfort zone.

New, as yet undiscovered friends…. are not! So, push yourself to look for them. Once you start on this course of action, it’s a lot easier than it looks!

See you at the next national skydiving champs!

(What have you always wanted to do …but have always put off? – Please share in the comments section below)

Jim Francis is the genius behind The Super Mind Evolution System which contains over 10 years of life-changing mind power research. Click here for more details…

…and with over 300 glowing testimonials in the last year ….if you really want to discover your FULL potential – what are you waiting for?!

.

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“I can’t believe I’m sixty.”  My friend Marlena sits across from me over lunch, my treat, a few days after her somewhat raucous sixtieth birthday party, held in a local art gallery and featuring a DJ and enthusiastic dancing along with the usual delicious food and cake.  “I’m not ready to be sixty,” she says in a plaintive voice, shaking her head.  “I don’t feel sixty.”

This is not the first time I have heard this phrase, “I don’t feel sixty (sixty-five, seventy, etc.).”  I hear it a lot these days, as my friends and contemporaries begin to reach the ages their grandparents were at the dawn of my friends’ childhood memories.  I may even have uttered it myself, in a lapse of under-awareness.

My first, off-the-cuff, somewhat flippant response is, “But of course you feel sixty – exactly.  You are sixty.  And how do you know what sixty feels like, anyway?  You’ve never been sixty before.”  Duh.   I am biting my tongue, which is so in my cheek – this is disingenuous.

Marlena rolls her eyes at me.  “You know that’s not what I mean,” she says.

I nod sheepishly.  “I know,” I say.  “What you mean is, you don’t feel like you think your grandparents felt like, when they were sixty, or what you imagine those other people feel like at sixty: beginning to lose your vigor and acuity, body starting to ache, losing interest in sex, memory not what it used to be – right?”

She nods.  “Yes, that’s what I mean.  I don’t feel decrepit.  I have plenty of energy; my thinking is flexible and creative.  I feel pretty much like I did when I was fifty, or forty.  Even twenty, sometimes.  I don’t feel old.”

We all have these notions.  We assume, and are assumed into, roles and attitudes based on our chronological age.  We know what it is “supposed” to feel like to be sixty, seventy, eighty, and so on.  Most of this is negative, but there are some positives too: younger people should defer to us; we are wise with experience and enhanced understanding.  “I don’t feel sixty” is a sort of protest, but over time, many of us will succumb to these stereotypes as self-fulfilling prophesies, so that people, when they reach a certain age, begin to feel and act according to their and others’ programmed preconceptions, in part, at least, because of these preconceptions, not any actual physical changes.

I am not denying that there are physical and metabolic changes that occur with increasing age.  But when in a person’s life these manifest and how severe they are is highly individual, depending not only on genetics but also lifestyle and, above all, attitude.  And I believe that these stereotypic ideas about aging that we unnecessarily carry around in our heads, age us well ahead of any physical aging.

It is a matter of attitude.  I do feel 65, and my 65 feels a lot like my 45 was, and in some ways like my 25.  I don’t want to be young (good thing, because I never will be); I don’t mind getting older and even older than that.  It’s those associations with being old that I want to dump.  I intend to preserve my strength, flexibility, energy, and mental acuity as much as I can and for as long as I can, chronological age be damned!

“Maybe this is what old feels like – to you,” I say to Marlena, with a wink.  She gives me a funny look.  Enough said, I tell myself – too much maybe.  Maybe I’ll write an article about this.

*****

One year later.  Now Marlena says she doesn’t feel sixty-one.

Last night anoter friend of mine said, “My memory gets worse every day.”  How much of that, I wondered, is observation and how much his expectation?  When a thirty-year-old can’t think of a name, she attributes it to a temporary lapse; it will come to her in a minute or two.  But someone sixty will often think, “I’m getting old, my memory is failing me.”  If that’s really true, of my friend, that his memory is getting worse every day, he should see a doctor or a nutritionist (or a hypnotist!), start doing memory-improvement exercises, or something – not just assume this is some inevitable consequence of how long he’s been alive.

There is so much negative thinking around, especially in regard to getting older.  “You can hypnotize yourself in the negative as well as for the positive,” I tell my clients, and it’s true.  Keep thinking that way and you will feel sixty – you will feel a hundred before you’re even seventy!

*****

Here is an exercise you can do, to begin to get used to the idea of remaining healthy, vigorous, and mentally acute as you continue to age.

1. 1. On paper (or in an electronic document) write, on the left “70”, “80”, “90”, “100”, “110”, and “120”, leaving space between them to write sentences each (if you want to stop at “110”, fine.  I like to push the envelope.)

Starting with the highest number, write a few sentences about what you imagine your life is like at that age, assuming that you are healthy, vigorous, and mentally active and acute.  For example:

110: I walk a mile every day, when the weather is decent.  I read a lot these days, and I occasionally give short talks and interviews.  I have resumed playing guitar.  I travel occasionally, especially to beaches in warm places.  I still see some clients, which keeps me on my toes, and I have several students who hang on my every word.

1. 2. Now take yourself into a self-hypnotic or meditative state (see “Finding the Zone” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PC-E4BZE54, a, for an example of how to do this).  For each of the ages you have listed, open your eyes and read what you wrote (maintaining that same altered state), then close them and visualize (with all your senses) yourself at that age, having that life.

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Donald is a hypnotherapist and NLP practitioner in Silver Spring, MD, where he helps his clients resolve troublesome issues in their lives. He has been happily married since 1977 and has three wonderful grown sons. His website is http://www.hypnosissilverspring.com/ and his blog is http://www.hypnosissilverspring.com/blog/.

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It’s difficult to pick up a success book without reading about the importance of goal setting and how to achieve goals but there’s something you may not realise about goal setting and that if you are not in the right place vibrationally, goal setting may actually be stopping you from getting what you want.

Now I know this may difficult for many of you to swallow because self-help books such as ’The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People’ really puts a strong emphasis on setting goals as the number one habit that will guarantee your success.

But this is not true for everybody.

How To NOT Achieve Goals

In order to understand why it might be holding you back, lets examine what happens when you set a goal and what effect it has on your vibration.

If you are like most people, you know what you want so you think that in order to get what you want, you need to set that as a goal and try really hard to achieve it. But then what happens is that you start to measure the desired result against what you actually have and suddenly if the result is not coming fast enough for you, a feeling of anxiety or desperation comes into your being and the goal suddenly starts to look unreachable. When you feel like this, you have put yourself in a vibrational stance of not having something because the goal stays exactly as that, a goal and not something that actually exists for you. In other words, you have just put up a big wall of resistance.

Let’s make this clearer. Whether or not you reach the goals you set for yourself does not depend on how hard you work or how much you think about the goals, it depends on whether or not you are in a state of allowing. Allowing is where real attainment happens.

How To Achieve Goals in Three Steps

When you set a goal, you are hoping that something will manifest and the process for manifesting things happens in three steps. Firstly, you have to ask for it. This isn’t a problem as we ask for things all the time. In fact every time you think of something you don’t want, you are thinking that you want the opposite. The second step is that the universe gives you what you want by putting things in motion for you. Step three is to be a vibrational match for what you want and you only be this when you feel good about something.

In fact when you do a visualisation or make an affirmation, you are actually engaging in step three, not step one. Affirmations are part of the art of allowing. The affirmations will only be effective if the feeling place you get to as a result of using them puts you in vibrational alignment with what you want.

Here is an example of vibrational alignment. Lets say one of my goals is to make twice as much money this year as I have made last year. This is a great goal but if when I think about money, all I can feel is the lack of it, this is vibrationally opposed to allowing it to happen. Lets say I replaced that feeling with a feeling of eagerness and fullfillment, and a KNOWING that it will be given. This is the vibration that the universe will respond to and will make the manifestation happen much sooner.

People who achieve their goals do so because because they are a vibrational match for them. Goal setting actually makes them feel good, not desperate. They know that the goal won’t be that hard to achieve if they just stay on track and they actually have fun with it instead of taking it too seriously. If you are not having fun with your goals, then you need to take a step back RELAX because this is the best way to ease the resistance you feel. Whatever you do, don’t look for evidence that your goals have manifested by looking at your physical environment. Look for evidence of your progress by seeing how you feel because if you feel positive and hopeful, your mind will allow the creative process to happen.

So there it is. It’s quite simple really.

All you need to do now is put it to work.

Cheers

Linda

Linda is certified NLP practitioner and owner of the popular mindset blog http:subliminalmindprogram.com. You can download a free copy of her e-book, ‘How Your Sub-conscious Mind Works’ by clicking here: http://subliminalmindprogram.com/freedownload/

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At this time in the evolution of our planet’s consciousness, I find that I and those around me are being challenged and called upon to heal our primary blocks to expressing and expanding our authentic being-ness, our true brilliance.

This is showing up as clients and friends dealing with issues around three primary areas.

1. How do I keep my heart open? The challenge to keeping an open heart is showing up in relationships as dashed expectations, judgment of others, and not feeling received or having one’s best intentions understood. At these times the (ego) instinct is to close our hearts for protection. We are also challenged to keep saying “Yes” to the universe instead of shutting down by world events and circumstances and by other people’s perceptions of these “scary” realities. First, knowing that our brains are wired to over-react is helpful. From that knowing we can then choose how we want to be in the world this minute and then the next. We may not be able to shut off our “buttons” completely but we can spend less and less time in reaction and more time being in purpose.

1. How do I stand in my true power? This challenge shows up related to feelings of one’s value and worthiness. Do you feel your value no matter who you interact with and no matter how society evaluates worth? Old standards of traditional value just don’t fit anymore as many people are striking out on pioneering paths of individual purpose and meaning. This worthy shift is about defining value from soul consciousness instead of social consciousness. Being clear of your personal definitions of value helps. Also, examining one’s limiting beliefs can effectively open pathways to understanding, knowing and transformation in this area.

1. 3. How do I really love myself? This is directly related to your awareness of how you see yourself, think about yourself, feel about yourself, and how much you appreciate what you have to offer. So often we are at war with ourselves on every front: with our bodies, our emotions, our thinking, and our ability to take action on our soul-directed dreams. Loving yourself starts with knowing how you dis yourself and then choosing to relate with more kindness, encouragement and affection. Totally the hardest thing you may need to shift and the one that makes the most difference to your sense of abundance and wellbeing.

Each of these challenges is an opportunity to get off the roller coaster of rising and falling emotions that correspond to factors outside oneself.

Each of these challenges is a reminder that you can make choices and decisions in each moment to stay on track in the expansion of your true self. You know your brilliance is broadcast out into the universe when in each moment:

• You trust that the universe is a safe and supportive place
• You bask in the beauty of nature and feel your connection to everything around you
• You approach life as a remarkable learning opportunity
• You appreciate the wonder that your body is and all it allows you to do
• You create and innovate as you’re inspired to
• You bring facets of soul into physical manifestation through your work and leisure activities
• You show up in life as a vehicle for kindness, compassion and unconditional love for yourself and others
• You speak your truth
• You pay attention to and follow your intuition
• You look for and see the miracles in life, and point them out to others

Want Exercise

To identify an area that may be blocked for you try this: Think of the messages that you received around “want.” Messages like, “What do you have to complain about, you want for nothing.” Part of our socializing as humans is around wanting: wanting more, wanting for something we can’t have, etc. This often contributes to our sense of lack. By first identifying your own programming you can then choose to reboot your brain and start believing differently.

Secondly, list all the ways in which you are FULL or list all the ways in which you choose fullness. You may choose to list FULL qualities like: trust, love, compassion, and acceptance. You could choose to be FULL in…heart, in creativity, in action. You can choose to feel your FULL vitality, excitement, heart, and radiance. The main point is to express the fullness of you and to affirm that you are perfectly abundant right now.

You are brilliance no matter what. You are light and your life is a vehicle for that light. Have confidence that you are always evolving toward your brightest expression of that light.

About Melissa

Melissa Wadsworth is a Certified Dream Coach®, Intuitive Dream Board Artist, Inspirational Speaker and Author. She guides evolutionary midlife makeovers for women at a crossroads, helping them to transition from Blocked to Brilliance™ for a life of full of purpose and passion. To access her complementary 11-day video course, How to Live the Life of Your Dreams Through Clarity, go to www.melissawadsworth.com

Are You Ready??

Take action to move through any blocks that prevent you from shining your brightest. Get clarity about your dreams and the beliefs that support those dreams. The Blocked to Brilliant 8-week video course and coaching session will empower this evolution. Go to www.melissawadsworth.com/blocked-to-brilliant-video-course for more information.

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