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Ask Cyndi – Internal Gridlock

In your response to Steve, you described sitting in front of computer, wanting so badly to give him the perfect answer, and nothing would come up on the screen.

That describes perfectly what happens when I try figuring out my life purpose; some people called it blocks; to me it feeels like mental constipation…something needs to come out, but can’t.

All the teachers say follow your passion, but the thing that gives me the most joy is learning, the joy of discovery. So most of my life has been spent holding different jobs and careers, learning business, art, psychology, sociology, health care, healing, nature, spirituality, metaphysics and anything else that helps me to experience and understand creation in all its glory and complexity

A part of me(the adult) feels that I should integrate this knowledge, and do something more meaningful, but my inner child just wants to play and have fun (that’s what learning represents for her). She loves to constantly meet new people and have new experiences.

So I am in a state of internal gridlock

Have asked for guidance through journaling, meditation, but seem to be suspended in a state of limbo…the divine airwaves are very quiet. I have the distinct feeling that it’s my decision to make.

Would appreciate any insights and advice that you can give. Thank you


ps always enjoy your ezine and read it faithfully; you are doing a fantastic job

Hi Irene;

What does meaningful look like I wonder?  Does it require a certain “title” next to your name, a specific income, or a best selling book?

Teachers like Abraham and Jim Self tell us that there is nothing more important than feeling good.  When we feel good  we raise our own vibration as well as the vibrations of everyone we come in contact with.  When we are happy we spread happiness.

So if you are happy learning – then learn.  Why not be a perpetual student?  Who ever told you that wasn’t meaningful?

My advice (since you asked :-)   ) is simple.  Trying to figure out your life purpose is causing blocks – well then – stop trying to figure it out.  Just let it go.

Instead – start asking yourself…

What is the best thing I can do in this Moment?

What will Serve the Highest and Best Now?

What can I do to raise my own vibration just a little Now?

Let yourself off the hook and practice a bit of selfishness.  Your job is not to save the world – your job is to be happy.  And from your question above it looks like you know how to be happy – so be happy.


About Ask Cyndi

To learn more about me and  a little bit about my motivation  see…Why Ask Cyndi

The questions that I answer will be published in the ezine and an email will also be sent to the person who asked the question.  I initially thought that I wouldn’t use real names in my reply – but the energy wasn’t quite right (I sit in presence with everyone I communicate with)- so unless requested otherwise I will use your first name in the response.

My plan is to publish new questions 3-5 times a week (or more) – so check back often

Please use the comment section at the end of post (after the form below) to share your thoughts on the question and the response.  We are a Community that is growing in Love and Light in every moment – and our combined intention for the Highest and Best can and will move mountains :-)

To submit your own question to Ask Cyndi  fill in the following form.  When you hit the submit button the information on the form will be sent to my email address.  In the response I will use your first name (unless requested otherwise) but your email address will remain confidential.  Do not use this form to leave comments – for that go to the comment section below the post

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5 Responses to “Ask Cyndi – Internal Gridlock”

  1. Irene says:

    hi Cyndi
    While reading your reply, I experienced a sense of guilt and the lights went on. The earlier years of my life involved hard work, hardship and struggle, so I guess there is still a part of me that believes that’s what life is about. Have been working on clearing my limiting beliefs, but those suckers seem to have some deep roots.

    I have heard Abraham and Jim Self’s messages on feeling good, and it made sense…but there was something about those messages that didn’t quite sit right with me. Now I understand why.

    Also associated life purpose with being serious and heavy duty, not something that could be fun and easy.

    Thanks so much for your thoughtfullness and helping me gain clarity. The idea of being a perpetual student just put a smile on my face and really made me happy.

    love and blessings

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  2. AdminCyndi says:

    From Leila…

    Hi Cyndi, I have come to this same conclusion over the past months. If looking for something to make you feel better makes you feel worse, it’s probably better not to look for it. Great advice.

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  3. Laurel says:

    I got your response immediately. I have felt bad about not having ‘found’ my life’s purpose. I have so many interests, and am most passionate about learning new things, like Irene. Thank you for your response. It was just what I needed, right when I needed it. And thank you, Irene, for your question. Many blessings to you both!

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  4. Carol says:

    Hi Cyndi:

    I wonder often why some people seem to be so guided toward their very specific futures, and often these people have come by those careers by what seems to be a serendipitous event, something that happened to change their entire direction from the one they had begun, and having done so, have become amazingly successful.

    My husband has worked in the film business all of his adult life; he’s a very creative person who loves the process of creating, but more often than not, he comes in contact with projects that begin well and finish with paychecks bouncing, the persons who have hired him have begun to be dishonest in one way or another. The film business is all that he really knows and now that he’s 61, work is becoming more and more difficult to find. Our own son is quite successful in the film business but has not been able to help my husband get into a film union, which is a process that takes working so many days on a given union show. This just hasn’t happened. My husband lost his ‘day job’ in February and we are close to losing our home due to the downturn in the market place. All things seem to be going against us yet we are very spiritually aware and seeking people.
    We are charitable to everyone we know and pray for guidance, but seem to be where we aren’t getting the strong signals as to what to do at this time of life. I wonder why some seem to guided, others seem so lost.

    This is just a capsule of what’s going on, but I would just like your thoughts on why we can’t seem to find the path that’s going to make the difference. Of course, I know that people can bring their own rain cloud with them and I wonder if this is the case — negative expectations seem to always deliver negative results — but, my husband would say, “I always begin with great enthusiasm and optimism but things always seem to deteriorate very shortly after a new project has begun.

    I believe now I’m rambling, but I hope my query is clear enough for you to find something to respond to that will help us see things in a better light.
    Thanks so much! I love reading the comments and responses by other seekers!

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  5. PJ says:


    It has been my experience in my own past that we indeed bring about our own experiences. We are walking the path that we requested. What we need to do is figure out what the lesson is that needs to be learned so that we can move on. I know, it seems trite to say that when what you are going through is so intense. Please believe it when I tell you that I’m writing this from an experience of such intensity that I would not wish this lesson on my worst enemy. I’m still figuring out the lesson from my own path. I’m reminded of a quote I have heard many times: Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, either way you’re right. My suggestion to you is to realize that at this moment in time: You are whole & complete & one with the Divine presence which created you. Merge your vibration with Source vibration, accept the lesson, and move onward and upward.

    Much Love & Blessings are wished for you and your husband on your journey,

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