Hi Cyndi – I’m divorced a little over 5 years now; it was a good decision and I’m grateful that my husband and I have remained friendly. He calls and visits often.
Lately, I’ve been wondering if having his energy around so much is blocking the space for me to attract new, healthy romantic relationships. I really want a loving and supportive relationship in my life.
It’s also nice to have someone around on occasion to lift heavy objects.
Can I create the space for new loving relationships under these conditions. What can I do?
Yes – you can create the space for new loving relationships under the conditions you describe – and as I read over your question there are a number of ideas I would like you to consider working with…
1) Work with The Rose to continue to call yourself back from your ex husband and to pull whatever of him that is left in your space. This will enable you to enjoy his company without the energetic connection that may hold you back from moving forward. I have described the use of the Rose in some past Ask Cyndi posts -or you can visit http://masteringalchemy.com and listen to Jim Self’s free audio series The Tools for more specific details.
2) Take the time to create a list of the 100 things you want in the ideal perfect relationship. Take your time with this list – and play with it and edit it until it feels just right. And have fun with the process. Really take the time to consider everything – the look, the feel, the experiences. And the number 100 (or even 101) is important. Allow yourself to dig deep and use the list to fill in your ideal story.
3) Take another piece of paper and begin a list of who you intend to be in that perfect relationship. Are there things about yourself that you would like to enhance to fit the story you have created in number 2? For instance – does your list include long hikes but you don’t own hiking books and you haven’t exercised in 18 months? Take a look at this list – then decide where to start and take some action to step into the story you created in #2. Purchase those hiking books and get out and begin to walk
4) And finally make room in your life and your home for a new man. Does your dream include him moving into your home? If so – is their closet space for him? Does the 2 car garage have room for his car next to yours? Sometimes all you have to do is provide the space and that ideal someone will walk right into it.
Have fun with all these steps. The more you enjoy it the more magic you instill into the process – the more seemingly miraculous the results…
and please come back and tell us what happens – my smile is broadening just sitting with what I see you creating…
Loving the Journey
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