First, I want to thank you for your words and help. They are always precious to me and your bit about boredom is fantastic.
My question relates to resistance to healing. I observe it in others and myself and am baffled. We have so many ways to get and feel better, so many techniques and we use them and they work! I for one have experienced the benefit of Reiki, meditation etc…yet, i always end up resorting to the same unhealthy destructive habits. I do not think it’s because these techniques don’t work, (I know they do), but because there is deep resistance to get better. I read and understand the theory and yet, although things improve, they do too slowly simply because something in me wants to stick to the destructive ways I have been using for almost 30 years of my life. I feel I have no excuse, I get on my own nerves and wonder: why am i doing this and where should I begin to change that, really, once and for good?
With love and light,
First – thank you for your kind words – they bless and strengthen me
Second – I am publishing your question as much because I have some thoughts on the matter as because I am hoping that your question begins a dialog within the comment section. As much as I have some ideas – I am also playing with my own healing issues – and so I am very well aware that I do not have all the answers – at least not in a way that has me saying that I am totally healed – awakened – and living in a constant state of peace….
Ok – so here are my thoughts….
As I tune into you the first thing I want to suggest you do is look at what you are assuming to be true. I expect that if you really take stock on where you are in the present moment you will realize that you are making tremendous progress. Take some time to look at where you have been – instead of constantly looking at where you think you want to be. Celebrate who you are in this moment and taking whatever is your next best step will be easy.
Clementine – I can hear you arguing in my head – the “yeah buts” with the list of all that has to change and all the times you have fallen down and my statement remains the same. If you are honest with yourself you will discover you are soooooooooooo much better than you think you are – and that you are doing and being so much more than you give yourself credit for.
I was speaking to a niece this weekend who was having some behavior issues with a young daughter. She had just finished some training in what she called the 80/20 rule (there are a lot of those – aren’t there?) – where she learned that parents typically expend 80% of their energy disciplining and correcting their children – and 20% focusing on what they are doing right. All she was asked to do was reverse it – spending 80% of her energy with her child finding the things that were done well – and then commend and praise with enthusiasm.
My niece told me it only took 3 days before their was a drastic improvement in her daughters behavior – she was eating up the positive reinforcement and going out of her way – behaving and cooperating – to receive more.
What I would like to suggest is that – based upon the wording of your question – that you are spending 80% of your energy focused on “what’s going wrong” and that if you consider reversing that – just for a few days – consciously and with enthusiasm – that you may also see some amazing changes.
The other thing I would like you to consider is renaming the resistance. Yes – it may have appeared deep rooted in the past – but that doesn’t mean it is deep rooted now. Why don’t you consider looking at it as something that is easy to move through.
I have found myself pondering the same questions you are asking here many times – and they are a slippery slope if you are not careful. In a previous post I spoke about the importance of the questions we ask – and when questions like the one you asked show up in my head I move to turn them around as soon as I catch myself….
- How Can I move through any resistance with ease and grace?
-What steps can I take to live my Highest and Best life Now?
-How can I more effectively leave the past in the past and bring all my power in the present moment?
-What can I do now to remind myself just how wonderful I really am?
I have a quote (please don’t ask me who first said it – I didn’t write that down) that I copied and taped above my computer. It reads….
“Even if our efforts of attention seem for years to be producing no result, one day a light that is in exact proportion to them will flood the soul”
About Ask Cyndi
To learn more about me and a little bit about my motivation see…Why Ask Cyndi
The questions that I answer will be published in the ezine and an email will also be sent to the person who asked the question. I initially thought that I wouldn’t use real names in my reply – but the energy wasn’t quite right (I sit in presence with everyone I communicate with)- so unless requested otherwise I will use your first name in the response.
My plan is to publish new questions at least once a week – so check back often
Please use the comment section at the end of post to share your thoughts on the question and the response. We are a Community that is growing in Love and Light in every moment – and our combined intention for the Highest and Best can and will move mountains
To submit your own question to Ask Cyndi send an email to cyndi(at)evolutionezine.com. In the response I will use your first name (unless requested otherwise) but your email address will remain confidential.