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Ask Cyndi: I Need To Discover My Passion

Hi Cyndi,

I feel that I need to discover my passion and I feel so lost and sad at times. I’ve been writing lists, meditating, trying to find out what is it that gives me sense of fulfillment..I even let it go. And..nothing. I come up with at least 5 things which makes my heart sing..for a while. You see, that’s the thing: I get bored after a while (weeks, months) no matter how much I love doing something. I’m 31 years old, highly educated and unemployed. And the reason is that I don’t really know what I want to do with my life and I have no goal. I’m wasting my time doing nothing which makes me so sad because I have no idea in which direction I should go. Please, what should I do/focus on?

I appreciate your advice.



Hi Anna;

What if I told you that your purpose in life is to taste of it’s many flavors – and that what you are calling boredom is but your Higher Self’s signal to you that you have learned all you need to learn and that’s time to move on?

What if you considered the possibility  that a very acceptable way of journeying is to stay on the surface of it, at least for a while, experimenting and playing with whatever seems interesting for only as long as it was interesting and that  what is most important is to smile often, to be happy, and to like yourself.

So many of us suffer needlessly because we have been taught that our life is suppose to look a certain way.  By a certain age we are suppose to know what we want to be when we grow up and that we are suppose to  then spend the rest of our lives happily being it.

Well, that’s not the way my life  has looked and I used to choose anxiety and sadness because of it, until…

I surrendered wanting to know the answers and started allowing what was, in this moment, to be OK.  I started allowing who I was to be OK now – even when the world told me I wasn’t.

And then interesting opportunities began to present themselves and I played with the ones that caught my interest – until I let them go.

Sometimes we spend so much time trying to figure out what to do we forget to be.  We spend so much time thinking there is something about us that needs to be fixed that we forget how awesome we are right now.

You asked for my advice – here it is…

For the next 7 days put down the lists, the journals, the self examinations, any and all of it that looks like a search for answers.  Just put it down.

Also for seven days eliminate or severely limit anything that we humans like to use to distract us from ourselves – TV, radio, the computer, newspapers, alcohol, high intensity exercise,talking about our problems, etc.

Also for 7 days stop reading books – just let it all go.

What to do?

Walk, sit, watch the thoughts that travel across the surface of your mind.

Doodle, sketch, color if you like


If  emotions come up, let them and watch them, without judgement.  Watch them come and watch them go and watch them come again.

Be with yourself.

If  this is too hard to do for 7 days – then do it for 2 or 3  – or even just one 24 hour period.  Give yourself a break from this belief that you are required to be something you are not in order to be happy and fullfilled.  Allow yourself to empty.

And then – when this period of quiet is over – pick up your journal and write about the experience – and write about the insights that came to you during this time…

And consider writing to us to let us know what happened

Sending Much Joy

About Ask Cyndi

To learn more about me and a little bit about my motivation see…Why Ask Cyndi

The questions that I answer will be published in the ezine and an email will also be sent to the person who asked the question. I initially thought that I wouldn’t use real names in my reply – but the energy wasn’t quite right (I sit in presence with everyone I communicate with)- so unless requested otherwise I will use your first name in the response.

My plan is to publish new questions 3-5 times a week (or more) – so check back often

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7 Responses to “Ask Cyndi: I Need To Discover My Passion”

  1. Nanette says:

    Thank you Cyndi for that very brilliant response. I think we all forget we’re human
    beings rather than human doings.

    I’ve been thinking about doing what you’ve suggested – going on an information fast. Wow. That’s a challenge.

    What I can start with right now is being present to this moment, this day, and the perfection of what is.

    Thanks for the reminder!

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  2. Ron says:

    Thats pretty good advice but I had to get mad at the situation I was in to get the answers I needed to find. A total rebuild was in store for my self and where I wanted to go. Following the path that was in my life the whole time had to be found and it took some real soul searching to find it, then it was an oh yea moment for me. Good advice there Cyndi.

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  3. Theo says:

    I was often told as a child that I lacked “stick to it tiveness,” by my father after I abandoned whatever my latest project/plan was. Those words, buried so deeply in my other than conscious mind, still, at the age of 77, surface to see haunt me. Over the years, using determination, hypnosis and N L P I’ve overcome some of the damage those words caused. One example being that I became a full time college student at 39 and graduated with a 3.87 G P A 4 1/2 years later. Still, I know those words are lurking in my inner-mind. Something else that I often heard as a youngster was “Jack of all trades, master of none.” That too was a denigrating,(am I stretching if I say ABUSIVE?)statement. The old rubric applies: “When the student is ready the Master appears.” Thanks for your question Anna. I am grateful to you Cyndi for your wise answer.

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  4. Therese says:

    I just want to express my gratitude to both of you. First to Anna to ask for advice and to Cyndi for answering. I am 58 and go same way through my life like Anna. Through my programing by my environment (you have to work hard for you money, it is only decent and honest life if you work hard etc, etc….)I did work hard and such a boring jobs for 27 years until 3 years ago I created exit opportunity. Now I am free and my ‘problems’ just started. I feel guilty that I just can’t get myself to start another crappy job but I just don’t see how I can make living with things that I really would love to do as I don’t have any money to start my own business or get education on something that I would love to do or just to experiment and to find out what that would be. As Anna says, I get bored with things also and I probably self sabotage opportunities because if I start something and discover that I don’t want to continue with it my family would not understand, I would be a failure, a foolish dreamer.
    Thank’s to you Cyndi for explaining to Anna why she ‘choose’ that life path and feel bored with everything she start of.

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  5. Nickie says:

    I concur with all the above in saying the advice given by Cyndi to be very good indeed. We are so conditioned to think that the only ones deserving of appreciation and congratulation are the ones who work hard. The harder you work the better a person you are deemed to be in the eyes of the beholder. But often work is not all positive. Work is often considered to take pride of place, more important than one’s family. So families can often be neglected because of a job being more important. is that right? Everything is so fast these days, people are so absorbed with their gadgets they have little time to think. Is that where they want us?

    Personally on several occasions I have found that a day dedicated to working on music was met with some confusion wondering what I was doing, stuck. So I just sat because I was finding I couldn’t motivate myself to do anything more and as a result I decided to put pen to paper to let whatever was holding me back flow onto the page. And as a result of this state of beingness of just sitting, either poems or songs ensued. It was as if I was being forced to sit still so that these words could then flow. So what I am trying to say is out of non doing, can flow inspiration. The lack of motivation is perhaps the minds way of trying to get through to us what it is we are supposed to be doing and it can only achieve that if we sit still and listen.

    Good luck Anna in finding peace, joy and fulfillment and whatever will make your heart sing.


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  6. Anna says:

    Thank you Cyndi and thank you all who replied :) . I feel much better now and I will follow your advice. Blessings and love to you all.

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  7. Ronny says:

    Dear passionless,
    I spent my life earning money at what seemed interesting or profitable. I never knew what I really wanted to spend my passion on. I found it, It was there the whole time and it took alot to find it. But the answer to my passionate work was all of the previously tried experiences. They all came together to fulfill my wildest dreams. If it was not for all of my previous experience I would not be able to accomplish my present situation. Keep moving and dont sit and look at one thing or youll get it. LOA. Never presure your self into a exsperience and never look at anything as a bad trip or LOA will give it to ya. Keep up your search and put your LOVE behind every move and watch things grow.

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